Bizarre skin treatment

First of all, I must apologize for not blogging for the last 6 weeks or so. I've been so concentrated on getting my new business (http://www.wholesaleproductrep.com/) up and running, I've not had time for much else. It is still that way, but I realize I have other responsibilities as well.

So, without further ado, let me tell you about the 2 wildest skin/hair treatments I've ever heard of...

Hari's Salon in London (http://www.harissalon.com/) offers Bull Semen Hair Treatment. According to Daily Candy (http://www.dailycandy.com/), " A new, intense conditioning treatment at Hari’s uses organic pedigree Angus bull semen, fresh from Brooklet Farm in Cheshire. The substance’s pure protein, combined with katera, a protein-rich plant root, penetrates each shaft and deeply nourishes the hair." Apparently hair is super soft, silky, thick & bouncy. I couldn't find this on Hari's menu to find out how much it is....probably uber expensive. Anyone know? I just keep wondering how they get the bull semen.

So, last week Daily Candy emailed me (and thousands of others) that Hari's also now offers a Nightingale Poo Facial. Yes, bird poop. I know that in Chinese culture, bird spit soup is a delicacy which is hundreds of dollars per bowl (I always picture little Chinese men climbing trees to wipe birds tongues with a cotton swab for this), but I had no idea that bird feces was now being used to beautify our faces. Does this mean it qualifies as a 'green' product?
Daily Candy reports, "Due to the enzyme guanine (in the bird poop), an amino acid which purports to heal and bleach the skin, the substance has been used for millennia in Japan by geishas and Kabuki actors to remove make-up and by monks to polish their shaved heads.
The biggies aren’t scraped off any old windscreen; they’re completely purified before going anywhere near your face. And when they do — alongside gold leaf soap, adzuki bean scrub and green tea shea butter — they soften and brighten the skin." They say it's a deeply nourishing facial. Question...don't all of us (animals & humans) usually excrete toxins, not the stuff that that's good for us? And purified bird poop? What's left after it's purified?

So, to my friends & readers in London (or those visiting), I challenge you to one of these treatments. We all want to hear all about it! I want to know if these are worth it, or are just a bunch of, well, crap. I do have to say I'm intrigued, but not sure I could stomach the treatments.
Anyone else have any bizarre skincare treatments for us? Please do tell...